The strenuous labor and long period of discovery for this ordeal is now over, and I can begin to relate my final experiences of the last two evenings and Sunday morning. On Friday, May 13, I performed the Bornless One Envisioning Rite in its entirety, even though the directions specified a three day period of meditating before completion. I felt that having undergone this process for over eighteen months, I didn’t need to wait any further to complete this ordeal. Within myself, I felt as if everything was completely in order and in readiness. So, I followed my intuition as is my rule in the art of magick, and was not disappointed with the results. It was wholly and completely mind blowing, and I am still reeling from its effects.
My dreams leading up to this event have been quite vivid and instructive, and they gave me a strong sense of completion and fullness. I was more than ready to begin this working, and therefore more than prepared to undergo whatever impact it was to have on me. I am delighted to state that I found the Bornless One Envisioning ritual itself to be highly effective and more intense and powerful than anything that I have previously experienced. I had no difficulties in performing it, and was able to get everything worked out, particularly the substitutions that needed to be incorporated.
The Abramelin Lunar Ordeal, now a completed suite of rituals and workings, is not only highly effective, but is even more resplendent in its overall effects for the adherent than what I had originally thought. I can’t but recommend this new method to others who are interested in experiencing a pathway to personal illumination through the art of ritual magick. With respect to those who have faithfully followed the traditional Abramelin ordeal, I believe that I have developed a suitable alternative that others, who do not have the privilege of devoting from six to eighteen months exclusively to this working, may follow and achieve a similar end. That is, of course, my opinion, and those who might be critical of my efforts will have to at least judge it by performing the rituals and experiencing them for themselves. Needless to say, I should report what I experienced as part of my final engagement with this ordeal, since nothing more afterwards will need to be said.
I have completed this long struggle and I am so very glad that it is finally done - but what an amazing journey it has been! The total irony of this working is that it took me exactly, to the day, eighteen months to complete, which is the same amount of time specified for the German version of the traditional Abramelin ordeal. It has been something of wild ride at times, where I seemed to be floating a foot or two off the ground, so intense was the overall impact and its affect on me. Presently, I feel quite grounded and completely sober, which is so unlike what I felt over a year ago. Then, I needed to process everything that hadn’t been processed in my past, and I needed to figure out the final and most important ritual in the working, which was the Alchemical Hierogamy Rite of Union, based on the Chemical Wedding of Christian Rosencruetz.
Determining and developing that last rite took me over a year, but once I was able to deploy it, the other pieces all fell into place. I would assume that anyone else who would perform this ordeal, now that the complete suite of rituals has been written up, would take them around seven weekends to complete. Then, of course, the envisioning rite would be performed at the next available full moon. Still, that final working shouldn’t be performed until the magician’s internal state is fully resolved and all issues, past and present, have been adequately processed.
For those who might not fully understand the functionality of this rite, the Bornless One Envisioning is used to both realize and project into the future the full nature of one’s True Will, incorporating a charged and consecrated black mirror for this purpose. This ritual was distilled and developed from a group of rituals in the PGM (Greek Magical Papyrus in Translation) used for performing divination by skrying into a pool of ink. I had adapted these rituals into one monumental working that would divine through the HGA the nature of the magician’s past, present identity and future destiny. The divination rite is therefore split into three parts, representing the necessity for the magician to know his past, know who he is, and know what his future will be. Some of these questions can be answered by the magician, others require the intermediation of the HGA. This rite incorporates a two way methodology in regards to divination - passive perception and active projection. The objective of this rite is to project the magician’s desired and realized destiny into the future, thereby making it fully capable of being realized in the present.
Let me now relate all that happened to me on that last set of days when I performed the final ritual working in the Abramelin Lunar Ordeal.
Envisioning Rite - First Evening - Friday, May 13, 2011 (from 9:45 pm to around 12:45 am)
As I have stated previously, I decided to do the entire ritual the first night of the working. I would follow it up with smaller workings on Saturday evening and Sunday morning. On Saturday, I would just say the Mass of the Goddess and intone the Hidden Stele and the Death Delivering Stele. On Sunday, I would just intone the two Stele to complete the working. I would perform an impromptu skrying session on Saturday evening after the Mass, but only briefly connect with the black mirror on Sunday morning. Two other substitutions were also decided on for the working. I would forgo wearing a crown of ivy (because the season is still so early) and I would bless my cincture instead of using a strip of linen with words written on it, functioning as a kind of phylactery.
These are the order of ritual actions to be performed the first evening before performing the Envisioning rite:
1. Perform ablutions and then set a consecrated magick circle.
2. Bless the cincture before saying Mass, intoning the invocation instead of wearing it around my waist as a phylactery. This was well received, so I then completed the vesting for the Mass.
3. Perform the Mass of the Great Goddess up to the point of performing communion, then perform the following operations while there is still sacrament available.
- Intone the invocations of the Hidden Stele and Death Delivering Stele
- Bless the magick ring for a second time (the ring is the link to the HGA). I put on the ring, said the activating word and then summoned the HGA. The result of these operations produced a highly enhanced sensation of the HGA, and the ring was tingling with magick power.
- Consecrate the magick squares from the Book of Abramelin (selected squares printed on parchment) with sacral wine and charge with the directed power of the HGA.
I then completed the magickal Mass and proceeded with the Envisioning rite.
The intoned invocations from the Hidden Stele and the Death Delivering Stele (both of which are from the PGM) produced an incredible intensity of magickal power. I felt myself briefly enter into a trance state where I saw points of light form various kinds of star formulations and even heard some kind of celestial tinkling, like some vast, distant glass wind chime. I felt intoxicated, and a rush of euphoria filled my heart. I had to rest momentarily while I processed these experiences. I thought to myself that this is certainly quite an auspicious occurrence for the beginning of this working.
Bornless One Envisioning Rite: I wrote this ritual more than eighteen months ago, but it has never been performed by me until now. I was amazed at how well it flowed and appeared to build up the power. The invocations taken from the PGM were astonishingly powerful. I could not believe how potent these incantations were, and their overall magickal effect was completely amazing. I doubt that some of these incantations have been used in magick for nearly a couple of millennia, but they had lost nothing in the passage of time. I performed the macro-rite to summon the HGA, but of course, it was already very much present. Still, I sensed it joyously respond to the remedial summoning, making me feel as though I were enclosed in golden column of light. I then set the inverted Rose Ankh device to each of the four Angles and the center of the circle, and the accompanied incantations taken from the PGM made the performance vastly more intense and powerful. At this point in the ritual, the combined devices generated a kind of network of manifesting and empowering forces that seemed to transform the temple into some kind of royal emplacement. I almost expected to see a throne room and the royal chambers of some magnificent palace. The vortex had generated through its fused energies a kind of royal domain with the black mirror set at its core.
These final actions brought me to the place where the black mirror was ensconced, and as I sat before it I made invoking spirals over it with my transmutar wand. As I did this, while intoning additional PGM incantations, the black mirror began to glow and pulsate, going from an obsidian black to a silver white orb at intervals. I felt myself pulled into this pulsating orb, and it opened up, becoming like a vast tunnel or worm-hole between worlds, revealing itself as a kind of silver lattice structure surrounded by inky blackness. I found myself drawn deep into it, and it was as if I was within a tunnel, but it also seemed like it was within me, simultaneously. When I got to the point in the incantation where I was supposed to utter a series of magickal words like an Egyptian Baboon, the illusion ceased for a moment (due to my mirth), but then quickly reasserted itself. I then proceeded to contemplate upon the vastness of the black mirror, performing first an inquiry and projection for my past, present self-definition, and then my life’s destiny. These were the three Eyes (or I’s) in the Triangle - and I made this sign into the black mirror before starting each period of contemplation.
Contemplation on where I have been: I saw so many images of my past consisting of all of the most important and strategic moments, all of which led me to become who I am today. I saw these as a very rapid progression from the earliest memories to the present moment, yet each scene evolved slowly and fully, while my mind’s eye had already gone on to the next event. After a short while it seemed that all of these memories were unfolding simultaneously, creating a vast illusion of time and events occurring all at once. It was an amazing thing to behold, and I imagined that one perceives this when death is fully realized. At that moment, I felt a powerful thought overwhelm me that “I must fully accept everything that has happened to me as a product of my True Will and the power of fate and necessity.” I bowed to this wisdom, and felt all of these memories coalesce into a single point of light, and then enter deep into my soul. The black mirror became dark again, but only for a moment.
Contemplation on who I am - my true identity: The mirror blazed forth again, but this time I saw and felt the full force of my HGA, it entered into my being and filled me with joy, happiness, wholeness and an intoxicating euphoria. Because I had wed my HGA with the Element Godhead, it appeared to have a greater power and affinity for me, unlike at any previous time when I had performed the Bornless One invocation. Through the HGA I received a powerful and total sense of who I am, where I have been and what I must do to complete my life. I was told by it that the key to my future spiritual enfoldment was to cultivate spiritual love, bliss and ecstasy, and to realize this when summoning my higher self. Through this agency, I will experience the continual spiritual evolution that leads to mastery. Then the mirror went dark for the second time.
Contemplation on my ultimate destiny: I have accepted that I am now gone deep into middle age, and that I am passing into my final years of life. I have accomplished much, but so much yet remains to be done. My inner fear is that I will not have time to complete everything that I want to complete, in order to leave behind an effective legacy - a true measure of immortality. Yet what I have seen is that the most interesting and amazing events of my life have not yet occurred, and that I must learn to live at a far greater level than what I have been doing lately. I asked for the time and longevity to complete my work, and saw that indeed I could very well be long lived, if I work at ensuring that my gift of life is not squandered. I must work at being more healthy, and I can’t take anything for granted. The future is indeterminate, so what I have left of my years of productive life may be a decade, two or even three, but I can, by my actions, extend my life.
Yet death comes to all living beings, and I am no exception. Nothing is granted or pre-ordained to me or anyone, everything must be earned by steadfast commitments and hard, tireless work. I sensed that a number of procrastinating issues and tasks for me had been overturned, and I was now free to complete a number of outstanding tasks. I felt blessed, protected, loved and wisely guided by the HGA that was now fully activated and enshrouding me like a luminous golden cloud. Yet this great spirit was also inside of me, looking at the world through my eyes, and feeling the joy of life through my heart.
Once these events had transpired, the black mirror seemed to turn silvery white, and felt my will come from within me and project into the future that has not yet been determined. I sought to know in the remaining years of my life a profound stable simplicity, to be divested of all of the clutter and chaos of competing desires and ambitions, and to be refined and honed to one single aspiration. This aspiration was to be one with my HGA, and to waken from death seeing through its eyes and thinking and feeling with its mind. More of this incredible phenomena I can’t relate, but it went on for seemingly forever, extending from my mere physical form into the infinity of the Godhead itself, where the boundaries of time and space melted away to nothing, revealing a single blazing supernova that filled my eyes and mind with dazzling and brilliant light. I sensed during this extended moment that the HGA was with me and in me, my eternal companion in all things.
I pulled myself away from looking into the black mirror and laid down to rest, to close my eyes so that they wouldn’t see anything more. But still I saw the brilliant light and felt the bliss and ecstatic happiness until I passed into unconsciousness for a time. Finally, I woke up, and the temple atmosphere was alive with tiny sparks of light barely perceived. I marveled at these for a moment, but then sealed the circle, covered up the black mirror and magickal tools, extinguished the lamps and candles and retired for the night. Yet I was given so little peace that evening afterwards, for the visions continued on in my head deep into the night.
Continuing the Working - Saturday, May 14, 2011 (from 9:55 pm to around 11:28 pm)
The second evening came, but I was exhausted and tired from the previous evening’s working. I stumbled through the days activities, but after a couple of naps and a good meal, I felt more refreshed and ready to start the next part of the working. But in truth, the greater part of the working was already completed, and it seemed that the next two incidents were just merely the final parts of an already magnicent conclusion.
I said the Mass, and then intoned the two Stele incantations, which were just as powerful as they were previously, and after the rites were completed, I unsealed the vortices and sat before the black mirror. I uncovered it, and expected that it would be dark and lusterless, but I was surprised that it was still luminescent, but not as startling as it was previously. However, what was imparted to me indicated that the greater manifestation had already occurred, but what remained was just as important.
I was told in some manner (perhaps in my head) that the past is now completed - there is no more to be extracted from it other than memories of what had once been. The future potential is there for me to harvest, since so much has already been established by years of practice, work and research. I have not been lax all of these years of my life. Yet the key to it all is the present moment - what I do here and now will give a final shape to my remaining years. There is so much to do before I finally experience an end to this life, and previously I had so much doubt and despair as to whether all of it could even be completed. Yet now I am not alone or without an important powerful spiritual ally. The HGA has now engaged itself to me in my quest for completion, and the addition of that magick should make the future to be quite interesting. Whatever my work brings to fruition, the greatest work is the simple process of bringing my higher self incrementally closer to me, until there is no difference. I have already begun this process, but its maintenance and continuation is both simple and succinct. It is wholly up to me to ensure that it is brought to complete manifestation and total realization. So what I felt from this revelation was the impending urge and need to get to work - there is so much to do, but the joy is in the doing!
That is all I received this night, and the next day, I just performed the intonation of the Hidden Stele and the Death Delivering Stele in the morning, and lit a stick of incense. I felt completely resolved. The working was completed, and so was the ordeal. I collected up all of the sigils that had been placed in the temple so many months ago, and now I could move on to other and newer challenges. I am grateful for what I have experienced, and I feel optimistic and blessed for what the rest of my life has in store for me.